So today, I was working from home. I heard a frantic knock on my front door. I figured it was the postman with a package. They usually knock and walk away, to let me know the package is at the door. I ignored it. Then they began knocking on the door again. So, I tiptoed to the front door to look out the peep hole. The person on the other side of the door sported a bright orange construction worker vest. I didn’t know who the heck it was, and refused to answer the door.
She had a clip board in her hand too. So then I am thinking….am I being served papers or something. But still, no peep from me. After a while, the lady starts taking pictures of the front of my house. My heart starts racing. See last week, I was messing around on a realtor site and listed my home for sale. I just wanted to see if anyone would bite. I only listed it for 8 hours because the next morning, my phone was BLOWING up. I opened some insane portal of crazed realtors. They were like relentless, zombies after commission! ( I used to be a realtor, so I get it)
Anywhooooo, so now I am thinking… “this chick is about to put my house for sale!” . I monitor her and then notice she walks to my backyard….I forgot to lock it shut this morning. I become livid. So I open my patio door and begin screaming “Get Off My Property!!! NOW!!” She keeps asking if my name is XXXX. Then as she tries to explain herself, I cut her off and tell her I am going to call the police. I am looking real loco right now. So she runs to her car and they take off down the street.
I get back to my computer and I’m annoyed. I was on a work call, so I couldn’t call anyone to share that I had just chased some weirdo off my property.
All would have been well with the world if I didn’t get this message from my husband 5 mins later:
Awww damn!! Nobody told me she was coming! So this Allstate agent probably thinks I am theeee craziest person right now. I’m so embarrassed that I scared that poor woman off. In my head scarf nonetheless, you know to solidify the cray-cray.
I’m sorry Miss Allstate Lady!! I’m not crazy. Don’t up our premiums because you think I may pull out my shotgun on the next person that comes on my property.
I need a drink!